Dindins 2 – The Return

So I’ve yet again been extending my culinary skills beyond the microwave and “20-minutes-in-the-oven” mentality. Here is another example of the results to match my mother’s day roast so many of you wished I’d made for you!


Pretty mean-lookin’ piri-piri chicken with roasted vegetables, wouldn’t you agree?

In other news, I’m slowly trying to put my life [back] together. I don’t know what exactly has caused this sudden change but I feel a little more driven to do something about things. Maybe it’s the change in weather, the brighter days which are a god-send in contrast to the utterly despairing wintry nights I’ve had to bear through over the past few months. Whatever it is, I feel a little more alive. A little more motivated. Not so down and defeated. There were some days during winter I utterly saw no point to anything and felt like just giving in altogether. But a lack of action/conviction on my part and the introduction of spring has seen me through to today and here I am talking to you, my dear readers.

I’ve opened a savings account – something I should have really done years ago but at least it’s done now, right? – and at the moment I’ve got a standing order set up to pay 10% of whatever I get from the current unemployment benefits I receive into that account. Also, my dad’s place of work are looking to employ some 40 extra hands within the next month so we’re keeping fingers crossed on that front. It’ll be utterly soul-destroying machine work but 1) I doubt it’ll be more despairing than days on end dealing with depression and trying to find a point in life, and 2) it pays. Money. And gets me something to put on my CV. It won’t be what I want but at least it’s something.
Oh, and my bank have a funny way of covering their paying-in and cheque books…


Now if only they lived up to their name and Co-Operated and helped their internet customers smile, HO HO HO!

On a very positive note, I’ve been writing again. I kind of had to stop at one point because I’d missed doing it so much, missed the freedom of getting lost in my imagination, that it actually got me really down because I hadn’t done it in so long.
Again, no idea what has REALLY given me the drive to get back into the swing of pen’n'paper – probably the mix of the above weather changes etc, as well as the looming release of Sinead’s follow up to Rusty Halo, ‘Doors’ and her ever-inspiring passion for writing – but I’m glad it’s happened, all the same! I’ve been working on a small collection of pieces here and there that need some fine tuning before they meet my ever critical high standards and a couple more pieces need to be written up from scratch/notes before I might throw them together in a self-published book. Watch this space.

And while on the topic of good notes, I’ve had two very good pieces of news.
1) My mother beat cancer. I know I didn’t go into detail on this, and not many of you might have known but yes, it was caught early and cut out and now she just needs three weeks of radiotherapy before we can all return to a normal life.
2) My nan, who is suffering with dementia, had made spectacular steps in some sort of recovery. She’s been moved into a home and I don’t know whether it’s the medical attention paid to her or the social aspect of having to remember people’s names and faces in the common rooms etc (opposed to living by herself) but it was the first time in over a year that she looked me in the eye and didn’t have a blank expression on her face. She recognised me, but didn’t quite remember my name. But once we told her she was her old self again. She was more the grandmother I remember and I couldn’t be more thankful for it. She definitely seemed happier as well. Clearing out her flat on Monday really bought back some happy childhood memories.

That about brings us up to speed, readers! All-in-all, a pretty productive week all round.

I think I’m going to grab a big, black coffee, have a smoke and get some writing done before having dinner. While listening to Nine Inch Nails’ Ghosts album. If you haven’t heard this album, then you should, no two ways about it. It’s nothing like their older stuff. No painful, emo lyrics, it’s 100% instrumental and absolutely beautiful. Go listen, now!

Peace out!

Strange dreams are made of this

So yesterday my sister gave me a lift to Morrisons to go and grab some food and [energy] drink supplies for this Alex James Harvest festival I’ll be working as of tomorrow through to Sunday. It took us nearly thirty minutes to get there thanks to road works on the A449 so on the way back we decided to detour via her route to work, through all the twisty, turvy country lanes and cut out all the hassle of temporary lights and stand still. Pretty clever, us. No wonder she’s going to uni in three weeks (but that’s another story!)

Anyway, we were on our way back from Kingswinford and heading through Wombourne and as we rounded a corner on one ‘Gravel Hill’ I saw something and kinda freaked out a little. It was something from a dream I had some time ago. And I mean possibly years ago. It was a little arched bridge bridge which led to a path that forked in to two. All I remember from the dream is that I was looking for something, or someone, which a third party was also after it and naturally wanted my presence out of the equation. Sounds like a great set-up for a story, wouldn’t you agree? Only this particularly ‘chase’ happened to take place in my dreaming mind at a location just down the road from me which I have never seen before in my life .
Here it is, for your viewing pleasure. Although since Google shot this, it has changed a lot, the foliage has grown considerably, the trees are thicker and it looks a bit more wild and crazy!

What’s even weirder is my sister and I were talking about films earlier that day where the protagonist has a dream or a vision and then suddenly sees it in real life…

My mind is a-spinning.

Maybe I will have to find someone soon, and there’ll finally be an excuse not to just disappear off the face of the planet. What? You didn’t actually expect a post where I’d forget to mention the crippling, crushing presence of depression, did you?